I saw this quote last week and I have been thinking about it ever since. Who are those five people in my life? How are they contributing to who I am?
I mentioned it to my husband and he joked that he must be on average mostly female by now because he spends most of his time at home and at work with women. That is why he occasionally needs to visit Sportsman’s Warehouse.
To be honest, the one that I spend the most time with these days isn’t a person, although he might beg to differ. I spend more time with my dog Baxter than just about anyone else. They say that owners and their pets often resemble one another. I suppose that’s true with me and Baxter, perhaps with the exception of his facial hair (he has fabulous eyebrows). We both have to stretch a bit when we get up to move, we both grumble when we’re feeling cranky, we both struggle with irrational anxiety, and we both really love ice cream.
During our time together Baxter has taught me many lessons. He knows how to live in the moment and enjoy himself. He values routine. He knows that obedience brings blessing. He stops eating when he is full, exercises every day, and rests when he is tired. Based on all of this, I feel like Baxter makes a very positive contribution to my average.
As for the humans, I am blessed to have lots of loving and supportive people in my life. They know me well and encourage me to be the best possible version of myself. When I am out of balance, they point me back to my purpose and help me refocus. They listen to me rant, hold me when I fall apart, and tell me to snap out of it when I’m being ridiculous. They give me the freedom to be exactly who I am created to be.
However, there was a time in my life when those contributing to my average were not so helpful. I found myself in a place where I was surrounded primarily by negative people. All of that negative noise began to really affect me. I was extremely critical of everyone and everything, but I was the hardest on myself. I compared myself to others and constantly came up short. I had serious doubts about my purpose in life and I started to think about chasing after other people’s dreams instead of my own. I felt self-conscious, insecure, and inadequate.
I eventually came to the realization that I needed a change. The way to change negative behavior is to replace it with positive behavior, so I began to seek all things positive. I created some relationship boundaries that helped me to step away from those negative voices and move towards people who would encourage me. It wasn’t easy, but after a while I began to feel better. My attitude towards life and towards myself started to improve.
So, who are the ones contributing to your average? Are they lifting you up or holding you down? Do they bring out the best or the worst in you? Maybe it’s time for you to replace some negative voices with some positive. Or maybe you need to consider spending more time with a furry friend. They really are the best!
“A friend is someone who knows the song in your heart and can sing it back to you when you’ve forgotten the words. “ ~Albert Camus